Category Archives: Savories

Ku Klux Klams

Posted on November 16, 2016 by Michael Procopio

Clams are, by instinct and necessity of location, bottom feeders. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , | 30 Comments

A Columbus Day Casserole

Posted on October 9, 2016 by Michael Procopio

I thought long and hard about what might be appropriate to bring to a Columbus Day dinner attended mostly by people I’d never met before. After a short while, the answer was obvious: Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , , , , | 10 Comments

E Pluribus Pesto

Posted on March 14, 2016 by Michael Procopio

The poem is pungent with sweat and salt and garlic and groins. And the dressing is no less so. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , , , | 15 Comments

Kummerspeck

Posted on December 7, 2015 by Michael Procopio

[M]y brain would never forgive me if I forgot such a marvelously specific German term for the weight gained from inconsolate eating. “Grief bacon.” My wedge was flecked with specks of grief. I didn’t know whether to laugh at that or to cry. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , , | 76 Comments

Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore.

Posted on June 3, 2014 by Michael Procopio

Foul play is not suspected. Though in excellent health for a woman of her age, her ratings had been in decline for some time. She was 88. Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrities, Savories, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , | 12 Comments

Horta Culture.

Posted on July 24, 2013 by Michael Procopio

Calling horta “braised greens” is an act of descriptive kindness and far more appetizing than calling them what they essentially are, which is boiled weeds. Continue reading →

Posted in Savories | Tagged , , , , | 26 Comments

Southern Hospitality: Shrimp & Grits

Posted on January 29, 2013 by Michael Procopio

I had wanted to attend The Greenbrier symposium ever since a young woman recently returned from there mentioned it was the place to which Congress would flee in the event of a nuclear holocaust. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , | 21 Comments

Hortotiropita & The Five Stages of Restaurant Grief.

Posted on September 19, 2012 by Michael Procopio

Now you can understand my state of mind when, earlier this year, I suffered my own, devastating loss– the spanakotiropita, served at my restaurant since the day it first opened, vanished into phyllo-thin air. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

Anchovy Lover

Posted on August 7, 2012 by Michael Procopio

Serve the First-Day anchovies on their own, with just a drizzle of the marinade and a squeeze of fresh lemon.

Serve Second-Day anchovies on toasted bread with great lashings of butter.

Serve Third-Day anchovies to your cat.

Do not serve Seventh-Day anchovies on the Sabbath. Continue reading →

Posted in Meatness, Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , | 35 Comments

Mrs. Webb’s Fried Chicken

Posted on July 16, 2012 by Michael Procopio

I want to spread the news of this fried chicken like a televangelist spreads the Gospel.

Except I won’t be asking you for any money. Nor will I condemn you for not believing it is the One True Fried Chicken Recipe.

But it may very well be. Continue reading →

Posted in Savories | Tagged , , , , | 21 Comments