Category Archives: Uncategorized

Dazed and Infused

I happen to feel that people who like to drink their dinner should be allowed to enjoy themselves at the table just as much as those who prefer chewing do.
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The Biggest Sausage on Melrose

The evening started out innocently enough– a quiet back to school dinner with friends. But my highly-prized purity was somehow called into question before the appetizers had even arrived. Continue reading

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I Don’t Know Your Life

At the time, I took it for what it was– a punchline. I found the story funny and yet I resented it to some degree because it made me hungry for something I didn’t have– a bucket of crispy, salty, golden fried chicken– and more disappointed in the steaming pot of hen flesh in front of me that seemed to fall apart in my hand. Continue reading

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The Tijuana Donkey

If you are drinking Tijuana Donkeys alone, make certain to remove the whistle from your mouth before consuming to avoid unnecessary choking hazards. Continue reading

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Animal Queendom

I’m not certain if my sister simply has a thing for animals, or if they have a thing for her. Whatever the case, the feeling seems to be exceptionally mutual. Continue reading

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Jeeves and Worcestershire

Where would I keep him? In the closet? Not in this day and age. I don’t even have a butler’s pantry, but even if I did, it’s no place for a valet. Continue reading

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The Cheese Toast Incident

As I wondered whether or not it would be a good idea to serve them more alcohol, Debbie Reynolds broke the unbearable silence. Continue reading

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Thank You.

And here, in a furry little nut shell, is what I’ve come to think about all of this great stuff that’s happened over the past few days… Continue reading

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The Brown Russian

What on earth would I serve to friends who might drop by to have me explain the significance of The Kiss and Cry in Men’s Figure Skating? Continue reading

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Ensuring A Better New Year.

I’ve come out of 2013 a smidgen wiser, a little more experienced, and even a tad thinner. And I somehow managed to leave the depression of last year where it belonged– flushed down the toilet. Continue reading

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