Category Archives: Stage, Film, and Television

… and anything inspired by them

“Curtains” or: “7 Little Von Trapps and Then There Were None.”

How do you solve a problem like Maria? In the United States, the answer would probably be “by lethal injection”. Continue reading

Posted in Stage, Film, and Television, Sweets and the Like | Tagged , , , , , | 30 Comments

Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore.

Foul play is not suspected. Though in excellent health for a woman of her age, her ratings had been in decline for some time. She was 88. Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Savories, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , | 12 Comments

I Killed Audrey Hepburn

It’s true that travel can broaden the mind but, in rare cases, it can also lead to an international celebrity killing spree. Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Liquids, Rants and Stories, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , , | 31 Comments

A La Recherche du Pain Perdu.

There was nothing especially sweet about it, but then I thought, there rarely is with pain, whether it’s of the French or English variety. Continue reading

Posted in Breakfast Time, Holidays, Rants and Stories, Stage, Film, and Television, Sweets and the Like | Tagged , , , , , | 26 Comments

The Potion of Oblivion

I can drink sangria and watch Il Maesto’s films without tiring of either until death overtakes me. Or oblivion. Whichever one comes first. Continue reading

Posted in Liquids, Rants and Stories, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , | 15 Comments

Iles Flottantes: A Titanic Dessert Disaster

My original line of thinking was that I would make my 1/2 Titanic garnish thick enough to stand up by itself on the plate, but my engineering skills fall into a distant second place to my own imagination and the poor little boats kept falling over and sinking into the murky blue. Continue reading

Posted in Stage, Film, and Television, Sweets and the Like | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

Turner & Hooch

If I had to think about Turner and Hooch, it was going to be on my terms. And my terms generally involve cocktails. Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Liquids, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , , , | 12 Comments

Rosemary’s Baby Food

The great 20th century poet/philosopher Pat Benatar once remarked that “hell is for children.” Jean-Paul Sartre, a lesser-known thinker from the same century, wrote that “hell is other people.” I would like to take these ideas to the next, logical … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , | 24 Comments

Die, Vampire, Die.

We all have our demons– ghosts that haunt us, ogres who hide under our beds, vampires that swarm around our heads. I know I’ve got them and, if you’re the least bit introspective, I know you’ve got them, too.

Or, if you happen to be one of those people completely untroubled by the monsters of self-doubt, I’d love to know how you’ve managed it, though I probably won’t believe you. Continue reading

Posted in Meatness, Savories, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , , | 33 Comments

The Critic’s Choice

I’d like to think that the man I am today is much more diplomatic and secure than the man-boy I was back then. Though I’ll never totally rid myself of my Statleresque/Waldorfian nature, I have high hopes of greening myself with a dash of Kermit. Or maybe I could add a whiff of Animal, just to keep things exciting.

Just never, ever refer to me as The Swedish Chef or I will rip you to shreds.
Continue reading

Posted in Celebrities, Salad, Stage, Film, and Television | Tagged , , , , , | 30 Comments