Category Archives: Rants and Stories

…and other things that may or may not involve food.

Goodbye Twelve, Hello Thirteen…

Posted on January 25, 2012 by Michael Procopio

What mattered, I suppose, was that a throng of teenaged girls loved it. Well, they loved the cake pops certainly. They ate what was underneath when there were no more of them to devour. What (seemingly) took forever to produce was gone in no time.

Just like my goddaughter’s little girlhood. Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Rants and Stories, Sweets and the Like | Tagged , , , , , , | 47 Comments

Happy New Year, Happy Old Year.

Posted on January 2, 2012 by Michael Procopio

My first act of the New Year– make that my third act of the New Year after flushing the Old Year down the toilet and washing my hands with soap and hot water–  was to bake a loaf of bread. … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , , | 26 Comments

Practically Imperfect in Every Way.

Posted on December 22, 2011 by Michael Procopio

I’ve had a difficult relationship with “perfect” ever since I witnessed a measuring tape belonging to Mary Poppins refer to her as practically so in every way. We have the same initials, Mary and I, so the self-imposed pressure to emulate her … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Rants and Stories, Sweets and the Like | Tagged , , , , , , , | 42 Comments

Giving Proper Thanks

Posted on November 23, 2011 by Michael Procopio

I’m not much of a holiday person. While the essence of Christmas is a lovely thought, I can’t bear suffering through six to eight weeks of blinking lights and enforced good cheer. New Year’s Eve is nearly always disappointing, filled … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , , , | 31 Comments

Not Dead, But Resting

Posted on October 5, 2011 by Michael Procopio

Dear kind readers and gentlepeople, This is just a little note let you know that Food for The Thoughtless is not dead, but merely taking a much-needed rest. The author (pictured above) needed lots of sleep during the month of … Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , | 36 Comments

In Case You Missed It…

Posted on August 25, 2011 by Michael Procopio

Delicate matters such as venereal disease, marriage problems, interfamily issues, and the consistency of one’s stool are just a few examples of things that are best not discussed on Twitter. Unless, of course, you are Direct Messaging your doctor or marriage counselor. Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , | 60 Comments

John Wayne’s Meatballs

Posted on July 12, 2011 by Michael Procopio

The most famous movie cowboy in history was standing a few yards from me, sipping coffee in an old burgundy-colored robe. I waved to him and smiled. He waved back. It should have been a simple, brief encounter between a movie star and a five year-old boy except for one, important detail:

He wasn’t wearing any briefs. Continue reading →

Posted in Celebrities, Meatness, Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , , | 37 Comments

Touchscreen Dining: Out of Touch?

Posted on April 21, 2011 by Michael Procopio

Have you seen this contraption? It’s a 7 inch tall interactive, touchscreen restaurant menu tablet from E La Carte. And it might very well be part of your dining future. My feelings toward it are mixed, at best. I am … Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , , , , , | 29 Comments

Faggot

Posted on November 10, 2010 by Michael Procopio

I hate everything about this word. I hate the look of it, I hate the hard sound of it, I hate the power of it. I hate the hate of it. There is nothing pleasant about the word “faggot”. Even … Continue reading →

Posted in Meatness, Rants and Stories, Savories | Tagged , , , , , , | 84 Comments

Dead Giveaway: Enter to Win!

Posted on October 28, 2010 by Michael Procopio

A little while back, I was ranting about the epidemic of food bloggers giving away free stuff in order to entice people to their websites. Win a free immersion blender! Win a free sous vide machine! Win a free kidney! … Continue reading →

Posted in Rants and Stories | Tagged , , , , , | 52 Comments